Oh well. :P
Happy Birthday to my Godma :D - she's 1 year older today! (well, duh, but I forgot her age..) Anyway, sent her flowers and a cute picture message today.
Okay, I warn you people. This is gonna be a
very the emo post.
You know, sometimes I feel so damn lonely. Shit, I don't have any close friends. I mean,
the people who I thought were closest to me also
don't trust me but I tell everything to them.
And they think i'll spill. They think i'm a tattletale. They think i'm this little glass jar that can break any second.
I was.. and still am
damn hurt, can.
And when I found out they thought that of me, I reflected back on myself, and I thought, "Hey.. yeah, that's true. Maybe I spill without really realizing I said that." So I was more cautious, and since then
I watched what I said.
But then, they're still
distant.
They treat me as if i'm just some
normal friend.
But we've been
damn close for a long time already.
I feel damn hurt.
Damn fucking hurt.
Now when I think back, I realized that when they said all those things about me, they're just
talking shit. I don't know why, but everytime they plan a big outing, even amongst people I know, and grew up with,
they always exclude me.For some
fucked up reason, they always exclude me.
Even though they live so far apart from each other.
They always fucking exclude me.
I FEEL SO DAMN LONELY.Wanna get over with my life, go
start afresh in college, and i'll show them that I don't need them to survive.
Then when i'm popular, and they're clamoring to know me, i'll shun them, and
make them eat my dust. Let them feel how I felt when they did that to me before.
Sweet, bitter, revenge. Ahhhh...